The YouTubers watch a crazy Japanese music video that went viral called, ME!ME!ME! feat. daoko by TeddyLoid!
Anonymous asked:
y'know eden eternal is back?
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Yup, debating on whether or not I should let it be known that I am back
i always forget my grandma used to be a clown so it caught me the fuck off guard when she saw this
and no hesitation saying “oh it’s that creepy clown- oh he’s drinking that’s against clown code”
1. ARE YOU NOT GOING TO EXPLAIN YOUR GRANDMA’S PAST CLOWN CAREER?
2. WHAT’S CLOWN CODE??????????????
Clown code.
I call a lot of y'all clowns but it turns out that’s too good for you since even they live by a code.
So today I learned about clown code…
I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF
This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.
I would enjoy some good luck from the potato.
I need some luck right now, so all hail the Lucky Potato. Do your magic, Potato. I respect you so much I am capitalizing the "P" in Potato.
This is how the golden age of piracy ended.
The first mermaid to get tattoos :)
“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”
“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.
“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”
“i know.”
x
“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”
her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.
“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.
“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.
x
“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”
“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”
she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.
x
“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.
“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”
she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.
“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”
x
her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”
the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.
“why not?” the mermaid asks.
“he’ll win,” the first mate says.
the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.
x
the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.
“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”
x
the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.
“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”
they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.
she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.
the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.
x
she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.
x
“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.
she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.
“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”
the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time.
“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.
“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.
“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”
“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”
“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”
“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”
x
the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.
“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.
the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.
“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”
“and now?”
“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”
the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”
She protects her family.
Ok, so here's the deal-
Voting for Speaker is normally kind of a formality. The parties pick their guy, everyone votes on party lines, and ta da.
BUT the Republican lead in the house is so slim now, that about 20 Trump nuts have gone rogue- refusing to vote for McCarthy until McCarthy (who is a more normal Republican) agrees to some extreme right concessions. And so far no one is budging.
Apparently there is no protocol for what to do if a majority can't be reached. They just have to keep voting over and over. (This has happened before, though not since 1923. Once, in 1855 after the Whig Party collapsed, it took 2 months to finally reach a majority vote.)
There's basically 2 ways this goes:
1. the nut job trumpers who are holding things up right now can just keep demanding concessions from Mccarthy for their votes until he agrees, but so far all that's doing is apparently pissing off the more normal Republicans even more.
2. Some of the Democrats could go to McCarthy, ask for some concessions to the center, and break the stalemate by voting for him. (I don't really trust McCarthy with this, and there's a good chance that this would play badly with the Republican base. Unless they can really make Gaetz and Boebert look like the bad guys to their voters)
(It would be even funnier if the most moderate Republicans jumped ship and voted for the democrat just to spite the Trump nuts. But that's a 0% chance)
Link of it happening live:
https://www.c-span.org/video/?525065-1/house-ballot-elect-speaker&live=
Lololol the votes going to fail again.
Ok, so, with 435 voting members, you need 218 for a majority. Republicans have 222 seats- that means if Democrats hold the line (which they have, throwing all 212 of their votes for Jeffries in every vote so far), only 4 Republicans can vote for not-McCarthy for him to win. And so far we are at like 12 votes for Jones.
It looks like McCarthy is LOSING votes.
And Jones (who the Trumpers are rallying behind) is VOTING FOR MCCARTHY, but he can't get the others to listen to him!?
And we are back folks- a 4th vote and McCarthy STILL LOST.
At this point, the Republicans seem *done.* Trump even came out and supported McCarthy. Jim Jones, the guy that the nut jobs had been voting for, is supporting McCarthy.
Literally no one even knows *what* these people want. They need to just be disruptive because they can?
Who knew- insurrectionists are actually really fucking bad at...functional government.
So all of this really underscores an interesting weakness in this need for a majority.
When you have a solid 2 party system, where everyone votes lock step with party, getting a majority is no problem.
If you have a multi-party system where parties regularly have to compromise and ally with each other, you can get to a majority almost always but it takes a little longer (which, I would argue is basically what the Democrats constantly do. They really are a coalition party.)
But the situation that we have now, where we are functionally a 2 party system but one party is splintering but no one can really ally with any other party without it being political suicide? We could get stuck here for a while.
This has happened before. The worst was in 1855- the Whig party had splintered and we effectively had 5 parties (though the 3 smallest mostly worked together) in Congress. After 133 votes over 2 months, they basically gave up and agreed to accept a plurality vote for Speaker.
If the Republicans can't get their ducks in a row, we could be stuck without a functioning House for a while. At this rate, I suspect they'll have to ditch McCarthy and pick someone else (though not whoever the Freedom caucus assholes choose) to claw up enough votes. The possibility of McCarthy cutting a deal with the nutters OR the Democrats doesn't seem likely at all now.
He's lost again. 🤣
For some additional context: Part of the reason the MAGA crowd are refusing to budge toward McCarthy is that they see him as an RNC shill - which, tbh, he probably is. He's very tied in with the establishment. And so at this point, they've dug in their heels and there's very little chance of them budging even with concessions. Hell, the concessions McCarthy gave them before all this, up till the day of the first vote, probably helped convince them he's a weak willed patsy who will cave immediately (which he is).
However, the OTHER Republicans are now getting more and more pissed off about being held hostage by the MAGA crowd with basically no end goal (we're all very shocked that the MAGA block would do that, pls pause of gasps). So they're no longer willing to negotiate either. They've specifically turned down the suggestion to hold a Republican meeting over this, citing it would be negatively helpful (aka it would just lead to more fights and more stubbornness).
Dems, because of this, are actually closer to electing a Speaker. They are also getting rowdy. They have brought popcorn and alcohol (which is hilarious) and have started shouting during speeches when they disagree (even MORE hilarious, especially when it's round 6 going on round 7).
Honestly, crazy as it sounds, it's possible that one side or the other will cave and vote Dem, or that the Dems will get some concession that makes them willing to bend to McCarthy (but no way to the Freedom Caucus/MAGA bloc, not after everything).
This is such a goddamn funny start to the year.
The 6th vote just wrapped- same vote as before.
GIVE IT UP FOR VOTE NUMBER 8
So let me get this straight
1. Elon Musk buys Twitter
2. Elon Musk unbans Andrew Tate
3. Andrew Tate picks a fight with Greta Thunberg
4. Greta Thunberg ratios the shit out him
5. He gets mad and posts a video response
6. There's a Romanian pizza box in the video which twigs Romanian police of his location
7. He is raided and arrested for human trafficking
That is some fabulous fuck-around-find-out shit and a great end to the year.
